someday, Lord?

when rickey died on 11/5/11, i seriously had no idea what God might have in store for me. at that moment and in the moments, and days and weeks that followed, i just knew that i needed to continue to trust in Him and to trust that He would lead me. and He did, ever so graciously! as that fall gave way to winter and then winter turned into spring, our lives moved forward, jobs and graduation and even vacations. the girls and i were blessed with some extra money in december and spent some of the week before Christmas in chicago, tim & rochet {rickey's brother & sister-in-law} opened up and shared their lake home with us over spring break and then 7 & 1/2 months into this new journey, at the end of june of 2012 tim & rochet most graciously invited the girls and i to crash the party that was their anniversary trip to pensacola beach ... and we accepted their most generous offer.

the girls and i packed up the escape until there was no room for one.more.thing and started out on a road trip that made memories to last a lifetime!

i have always loved the sun, the sand and the waves and had never had the opportunity to spend days just enjoying the combination of those 3 things like we did at the condo on pensacola beach. they were days that i cherished ... but, they were days filled with the sadness of not sharing them with rickey and of all unknowns of the future. they were days of watching families and couples and again "feeling alone in a crowd". i had just left a job of 8 years and accepted another, tessa had graduated and was looking at what to do for college. the not knowing what the future held, was scary but the days at the beach were healing for my soul and it was in those days that i dared begin to dream that maybe, just maybe God had more of life and "someone" to share my life with in store for me.

so, as i sat on that beach on those lazy june days soaking up the sun and the sand and listening to the waves crashing, and the seagulls calling and my beautiful girls playing in the waves, i dared to dream. 

i dared to dream and to pray that maybe, just maybe God not only had future plans for me that could be "good" again, but that maybe, just maybe He had a special "someone" out there for me as well!

it was that i began to pray that if God didn't intend for me to remain single that He would make the path clear. that He would show me the way. i was intrigued that i had these feelings. i was scared to death to think of "dating" again at 45 years old and i was just a little excited to think that maybe, just maybe someday, sometime, i'd sit on a beach ... maybe the one i was sitting on, maybe a different one, but that i'd sit on a beach chair with someone special to me. someone who let me know i wasn't "alone in a crowd". someone who loved me. someone to call my own. someone to hook pinkies with {you know, so we didn't leave tan lines}!

little did i know, or dream that sometimes, God answers your prayers sooner than later and a few weeks after that vacation, He brought rick into my life!

fast forward to today. today it is 5 years and 3 months to the day that i began to pray that prayer. to surrender to God that i was open if He had someone out there for me ... and tomorrow?  tomorrow, rick and i will board a plane at 6:00 a.m., a plane bound for san diego, california!

through unexpected twists and turns and a few unknowns with my home based business after following the unexpected prodding by God to leave lularoe and join amelia james, rick & i are leaving tomorrow morning for san diego.  we will be heading to a rep retreat for amelia james. a "retreat" in san diego, california ...  where we have a tiny little room at an airbnb ... a tiny little room with one other home separating us from the beach.  a beach with beach chairs, and sun, and sand, and ocean. a beach very similar to the one that i sat on 5 years and 3 months ago!

though i will have some meetings and training time, we will be there together. we will get to walk hand in hand on the beach, and sit in the sand or on a beach chair and "pinky hook".

and what makes this even more "cool"? sunday will be our last morning in san diego. since they are 2 hours ahead of us, we will most likely be up to see the sunrise. sunrise at the beach, together ... never forgetting the past or those who have played such important roles in our lives, but also looking forward to the future ... the future that God alone has in store for us. the future that He has already written!

and sunday ... though the dates were not planned by us ... sunday we will wake up at the beach, with the sun and the sand and the waves. a beach, just like where i first dreamed that maybe God had someone in my future who would love me and cherish me ... and sunday, sunday rick and i will celebrate our 5th anniversary ... and i can't think of a better way to celebrate!

i've been blessed!

1 comment:

  1. Hello Sheila. I am a Pastor from Mumbai, India. I am glad to stop by your profile on the blogger and the blog post. I am blessed and feel privileged and honored to get connected with you as well as know you and about your love for the Lord as a born again child of God, through your profile on the blogger and the blog post. Very moving post .I love getting connected with the people of God around the globe to be encouraged, strengthened and praying for one another. I have been in the Pastoral ministry for last 38 yrs in this great city of Mumbai a city with a great contrast where richest of rich and the poorest of poor live. We reach out to the poorest of poor with the love of Christ to bring healing to the broken hearted. we also encourage young and the adults from the west to come to Mumbai to work with us during their vacation time. We would love to have you come with your friends to work with us during your vacation time. I am sure you will have a life changing experience. My email id is:dhwankhede(at)gmail(do)com and my name is Diwakar Wankhede. Looking forward to hear from you very soon. God's richest blessings on you, your family and friends.


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