{it.wasn't.november.5.}

i checked my cell phone and saw:

*missed call from Kajsa - 16 minutes ago* 

since she was down town decorating for the prom, i figured she was checking in, maybe asking if they could stop for coffee or bagels on the way home.

i quickly called her back and casually asked, "what's up"?

she said, "didn't you talk to rick {her step-dad}?" followed just as quickly by "we had an accident. we are all o.k., but my car isn't. oh, hang on, rick's here now." 

i was at the mall preparing for a vendor show. 

i was without a car.

 rick had dropped me off while he went to the studio for class.

it's the phone call i never want to get. it's the phone call that puts me back in time. it's the phone call that makes my knees weak and my heart skip a beat {or two or three} before it starts racing. for me, it put me right back to november 5, 2011, 

"i'm sorry, there's been an accident ..."

{i believe that's what they call p.t.s.d.}

i HEARD kajsa's voice.  .

I KNEW that meant she was o.k. 

i KNEW her step-dad who loves her very much was with her.

i KNEW cars can be repaired or replaced. 

i KNEW this wasn't november 5, 2011, but still...

ugh ... that feeling in the pit of my stomach!

rick later said he could imagine me leaving my display at the vendor show and running out of the mall and down the street, with no idea of where i was headed {i didn't do that - but i did think about it!}

instead, i sat down and prayed. and you know what? God gave me peace.

i still kept texting kajsa, just to make sure she was "o.k." but i wasn't in an out-and-out panic anymore! i was so thankful. she was o.k. she didn't need to go to the hospital. she would be able to go to the prom later in the day. i was so thankful. so very, very, very thankful!

i was thankful too, when rick brought kajsa over to me so i could see for myself that she was ok {bumped and bruised and a little "shook", but ok} and i was thankful a few hours later when she and all of her friends had the limo driver bring them to the mall so we could see all of them and take a few pictures!

again yesterday i was reminded that life is brief. things can change in the blink of an eye. we all are just one phone call from our knees. again i was reminded of the importance of telling those we love that we love them. of living life with no regrets. of making sure that we know who we serve and of knowing that we have placed our faith in Christ!




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