Showing posts from February, 2012

...lies, some helpful "hints" and SNOW DAYS!

Please don't read too much into this statistic . . . . I'm not saying that I've lied every time I've told you (or anyone else) that "I'm Fine", but this little quote DID catch my eye!  I think SO often we (whether in the midst of an earth shaking, rock your world crisis like us or just dealing with "living" day to day) are very quick to answer "I'm Fine".  It's just easier.  It's just quicker.  And, does the person asking REALLY want to know how we are, or is it just the "polite" question that we so often use when greeting one another?  Do I really want someone to answer that honestly?  Hhhhmmm . . . brings me BACK to the question I asked last night, DO I LOVE WELL?  How can I LOVE better, how can I ASK "How are you" and be ready for the REAL answer, not the "canned", "I'm Fine"?  That IS my desire, that IS one thing that I have learned on this new road that I'm on!!  I've…
. . . I am SO THANKFUL that even though I MUST walk my "road" myself, there are MANY others walking WITH me . . .!
It's late & I'm EXHAUSTED!  It was election day today (as Township Clerk, I am in "charge" our our local polling place) - it was election day the day we had Rick's funeral (my SWEET friend Bobbi & my other election ladies took over for me on that day!) - therefore, today was another F.I.R.S.T.  Another first that I survived.  Elections themselves went very smoothly.  I work with some awesome ladies, who I LOVE spending the 13 hour day with!  I ran into some trouble when the time came to "transmit" my results in that the phone lines did not want to co-operate . . . u.g.h.!  NOT what you want after a 13 + hour day.  I'm usually pretty "intense" and don't deal with with interruptions to my planned timetable very well.  Tonight, though, I remained calm until the issue was resolved - AGAIN, Rick still teaching …

... holding on ... and letting go ... ♥

Image your circumstances consume more and more of your attention,  you are losing sight of Me . . . yet I am with you always, HOLDING you by your right hand . . . I am fully aware of your situation!   ~ Jesus Calling
Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand.  Psalm 73:23
THAT is what I HAVE to hold on to . . . on the days like yesterday, on "those" days . . . I need to remember to HOLD on . . . He does know what He is doing . . . and He is ALWAYS holding me . . . He has promised that over and over!  Speaking of yesterday, today was a much better day.  I remembered to "grab" hold of HIS hand a little tighter again today . . . and He opened my eyes again to all of the blessings I DO have but sometimes fail to see and appreciate fully!  He is so amazing!  And, as I learn over and over and over again to "Hold On", I also am learning day by day to "Let Go" . . . I got a "crash course" in letting go on November 5, yet I have much…
I'm totally drained tonight . . . it's been one of "those days".  Just one of "those days"  Kind of one of those "one thing after another days".  A day where I felt "all alone" and that nobody understood . . . but, GOD did!  And for that, I'm so thankful!  I'm also so THANKFUL for my beautiful (outside AND inside) girls!  The day ended on a bright note as we went out for supper and laughed and loved together! ♥
As I was driving today, I heard AMAZING GRACE, MY CHAINS ARE GONE, the song from Rick's funeral . . . beautiful words, and so true, my chains ARE gone, my God my Savior has ransomed me!  And ALL of Rick's chains are gone . . . He has been fully rescued and ransomed!  I was also thinking about that moment when "God called him" . . . and I thought about that and how it could make me mad . . . why didn't he "fight" to stay with us?  Yet, I've never felt that, and today, it came to me . . . a…
Another Saturday has come and almost gone.  Yes they get easier, but they get harder too . . . A comment from my sweet friend Sandi has a post swirling in my head that I'm too tired to delve into tonight . . . the "thought" of it though is "the day "we" became "I"" . . . .
But for tonight, I will focus on the commandment given to me in 1 Thessalonians 5:18 "In EVERYTHING give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."


Be still in the Light of My Presence, while I communicate Love to you  . . .  there is no force in the universe as powerful as My Love.  You are constantly aware of limitations:  your own and others' . . . there is NO LIMIT to My Love; it fills all of space, time and eternity . . . the knowledge of My loving Presence is sufficient to carry you through each day!   "Jesus Calling"
" grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."  Ephesians 3:19
Amazing thoughts and verses.  And good reminders for me.  I'm NOT GOOD at "being still".  I am not a good "waiter" (the last couple weeks of pregnancy were TORTURE!!)  I want what I want, I want it NOW and I want it MY WAY! 
But, God tells me to BE STILL. BE STILL and KNOW. That's it. Four simple words. BE STILL AND KNOW.
Be still in the LIGHT of His presence . . . s…

♥ good friends ♥

♥ "good friends" Sounds like the name of a country song! I'm very thankful tonight for "good friends"! The kind who you may not see/talk to in months or sometimes even years, but, just like the stars that I don't always see . . .  THEY ARE THERE!
"Jesus Calling" this morning read: Live in the Light of My Presence by fixing your eyes on Me.  Then you will be able to run with endurance the race that is set before you.
"Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim You, who walk in the Light of Your presence, O LORD.  Psalm 89:15
I've struggled some today.  More about "circumstances" and people who I feel have "failed" me.  I've struggled MORE than I should have, because, I should know by now to TURN IT OVER TO HIM!  I HAVE learned to "speak my mind" a bit more than I used to do, yet, I've also learned to "speak it in love" better than I did before as well!  Today, I've "spoken" in my min…


... yep, that ^ was my today. u.g.h.! nothing fluffy. just overwhelming. wishing my BEST FRIEND was here. the ONE who quietly let me "unload". he didn't try to "fix" things. he just listened. ah, i miss him so! tonight, as i was "venting" to him, i heard him say  "you gotta be kiddin' me?" yep, i miss him. i'm so glad that i know the truth that  GOD IS ON MY SIDE. i CAN unload to Him. He will listen. He will "hold". He will overcome the circumstances. but tonight, i still wish for my "yesterdays". but will lie down in peace, trusting HIM to be in my tomorrow! i WILL CHOOSE to trust in this truth:

. . . weeping may last for the night, but JOY comes in the morning!  Psalm 30:5
i read my "Jesus Calling" this morning, but forgot to hold on to it throughout the day  . . . 
"You need Me every moment . . . the emptiness you feel within will be filled either with problems or My Presence . . . keep on asking and you will receive, …
...and, ultimately, THAT would be what I pray would come of this "test" that is now a part of my every day . . . that God WILL use it for HIS glory and I will be a TESTIMONY for him.
Today, a student returned to school after losing her 22 year old brother over the weekend.  She is in Tessa's grade and they ran cross-country together through their high school years.  Her dad and I graduated together.  When she got to school, we held each other and I told her "I know" . . . I don't "know" her exact pain - it's different for each and every person, yet, I do "know" more than many others do . . . please pray for Brook and her family through the rest of this difficult week . . . services will be held on Friday.
After school/work today, I went to the Town Hall to set up for the election next week and "test" the equipment.  The last election I set up for was held November 8.  I wasn't there.  I was at the funeral home that day.  …
"Life kicks you around sometimes.  It scares you and beats you up.  But there's one day you realize you're not just a survivor.  You're a fighter!  You're tougher than anything life throws your way. . . ."
As I was deciding "what" to write tonight, I was looking at Facebook and my sweet friend from my childhood (she was even my babysitter!), Sandi posted the above picture & quote to my timeline.  Sandi is also a "too-young" widow, so in addition to all our growing up memories, we have that in common as well - and I LOVE her to pieces! ♥
I'd like to add to the quote above though, that yes, "life" DID "kick me around" . . . it did scare me and I sure feel beat up.  I also am not just a "survivor", but a fighter . . . but, there-in lies what this quote missed . . . I {alone} am  not a survivor or a fighter, I am not tough in any way, shape or form . . . but . . .  I CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO GIVES…
Yep, that's really ALL I need to know! 
Jesus Calling 2/19 . . . "You can learn to be joyful in Me, your Savior, even in the midst of adverse circumstances.  Rely on Me, your Strength; I make your feet like the feet of a deer, enabling you to go on the heights."
...Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior.  The Sovereign LORD is my strength, He makes my feet like the feet of a deer, He enables me to go on the heights.  Habakkuk 3:19
HE is ALWAYS with me . . . even in the midst of "adverse circumstances" (well, now, n MY opinion, THAT's putting "it" mildly!) . . . but, RELY ON ME, your STRENGTH . . I will never leave you or forsake you.  The Sovereign LORD is my strength . . . HE will never leave me or forsake me . . . 
Yep, that's really ALL I need to know!
THIS is an awesome saying . . . and it does DEFINE what GOD is doing in my life - moment by moment!

Valentine's Day/Anniversary in photos . . . 

♥ never.alone ♥

... Tonight we were at a basketball game.  In a gym that was pretty FULL of people.  Tessa and some of her friends (Cody, Katie, Brigette), Taya and some of hers (Savannah, Rachel, Kaye), Kajsa, Daila & Maddie were sitting all around me.  My wonderful, sweet cousins from the team we were playing were in the gym-I visited with and got hugs from most of them . . . but, I felt like I was there all ALONE.
I'm NOT making this statement to ask for pity.  I'm just making a statement.  I did mention early on in writing here that it wouldn't always be pretty!  So, as I sat in a gym filled with 100's of people, including those I love the MOST here on earth, I felt alone.  I've sat alone at games "before".  But, "before" Rick was a text away.  Or a phone call away.  He was waiting at home, opening the door for us when we got there.  He worried along with me about Tessa driving home on the slippery roads.  He was HERE, I wasn't ALONE . . . 
It's i…