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Showing posts from May, 2012

so true! ♥

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longest.run.ever!

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5 months ago tomorrow, I challenged some friends and myself to do "at least a mile, at least 5 times a week". My goal was to complete my C25K (Couch to 5K) training program and be able to run ONE 5K!! I barely made it through WALKING that mile on December 31, but I kept at it...because I can be a little stubborn and I like a challenge ... I DID run that 5K - on March 17 (thanks to the encouragement of a couple of great friends - 2 who even came and walked it with me!) .... If you would have told me on December 31 or even on March 17 that I would still be running, that I'd look forward to it, that now a mile feels like I skipped my workout, I'd have said you were cRaZy!! BUT, tonight, I headed out for a run, I got to the road where I'd usually go to run the 5 mile "block" and turned around a mile in, I wasn't "feeling" it....I kept going though and "feeling" it finally kicked in and I finished the night with my.longest.run.ev…

f.r.i.e.n.d.s.

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This is so true for all of YOU, my friends!
I'm thankful for the part each and every one of you has in my life.
But, tonight . . . 

I just really miss my BEST FRIEND ♥

... another FIRST ...

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I wasn't going to post tonight. It's a night that ends a day of another "first".  We have never been big "celebrators" on Memorial Day, yet, it was still another first to get past. 


I started the day by picking 55 daisies to lay on Rick's grave.  I mentioned yesterday to Tessa that I wanted to get a YELLOW rose from me and 3 PINK roses from the girls for his grave and she said that she always wondered why people spent so much money to put things on people's graves (she IS the LEVEL - HEADED/frugal one!).  I guess God agreed as when I got into Walmart, there wasn't a flower to be found!  So, daisies, which are the flower that will always remind me of Rick, it was.  He'd like the daisies better anyway!

Even though we hardly ever went to the cemetery on Memorial Day, I went today, because I figured people would "expect" me to be there . . . oh, that fear of what people think, does it ever leave us?  It was nice to go, though and I was g…

Weekends....

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.....yes, they do get a little easier....the pain isn't so sharp and the "panic" feelings pass more quickly....the loneliness however is more noticeable. As life settles into more of a routine, the reality that this is really our life now sinks in a little more. This new being alone. All.the.time. Not the being alone as in the kids are gone for the day/evening/weekend, this is being alone as in I'm alone if I'm in my bedroom all by myself, if I'm sitting in a church service, if I'm working at a track meet, .... No matter when it is or where I am, I still feel "alone". If I'm truly alone or in a crowd. I'm working on trusting the Lord to fill those lonely places, and I KNOW He can, it's just different than a human being filling the empty places!! This weekend though, God sent some "filling" in the way of friends! On Saturday we had two unexpected visits - both of them reminding me of the LOVE that people have for us! S…
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BAD things DO happen to GOOD people . . .

I wasn't going to post tonight, because I'm just TIRED from our busy, busy weekend!  Taya had a track meet in Menominee tonight so I went down to that, ran some errands in town and came home and went for my run - the first one that felt "good" in a couple of days (couldn't be all that CAKE I've eaten in the past couple of days, now could it?)!!   
Anyway, I am posting tonight, but it's actually a "cut and paste" of a message that I sent someone on Facebook that also contains a "cut and paste" of a post that I did back in December . . . . (I have changed a few details here to offer some privacy).  My Facebook response is to someone who knows the Aunt who I mentioned last night - the one who just yesterday received a cancer diagnosis.    The person I responded to knows my Auntie quite well as we live in a small town.  She is questioning "why" . . . as we all are and we all do when "tragedy" hits just a little too close…

YOU saw me . . . ♥

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Psalm 139:16
One of my favorite verses.
One of my favorite promises.
The promise that God KNOWS.
The promise that God KNEW.
God laid out Rick's days before even ONE had passed.
We don't understand, but GOD does.  Our days are in HIS hands and HE knew of them before we even came to be.  With HIM, there are no mistakes.
Tonight we got the news that one of my Aunts found out that she has cancer.  Not many details are known yet.  Those will come in the days and weeks ahead.  Another reminder to us of how precious LIFE is. Another reminder to live and laugh and love and hug our loved ones.  We DON'T know what tomorrow will bring.  BUT HE DOES!
Tonight, I will fall asleep with my Aunt & Uncle, their kids, grandkids & great-grandkids on my heart and in my prayers. I will be thinking about and praying for my dad and the other siblings. I am again reminded of how unpredictable (to us) life can be.  I'm thankful that we can bring it all to HIM who is not surprised by today's…

...for I KNOW!

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Amazing kids, amazing weekend, amazing God!
Daddy was sorely missed, yet this weekend, we celebrated LIFE and LOVE and FAMILY and ACCOMPLISHMENTS!! :)
There are MANY, many more pictures, but tonight I'm EXHAUSTED!
And PROUD!
And feeling SO BLESSED . . . I have been left with wonderful memories of Rick, a heart full of LOVE for him and the WONDERFUL life we shared and the AWESOME kids that we were blessed with!  
"For I KNOW the plans I have for you says the LORD!" Jeremiah 29:11

a tree . . . God gave me a tree!

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I'm not sure "beautiful" or "perfect" are exactly the "right" words to use, yet they are the ones that come to mind with these pictures.  The setting IS beautiful.  I remember clearly the morning I went to the cemetery to pick out a "final resting place" for Rick.  On the way there, I prayed for a tree.  Yep, a tree.  But, I KNEW there couldn't be a tree because the spots available are in the "new" part of the cemetery.  New meaning just recently developed.  New meaning pretty, very well manicured grass with some small hills, but no trees.  For some reason, a tree was really important to me.  A tree represented the woods - a place Rick LOVED to be.  A place he always said he felt the closest to God.  A place he spent much time IN (he bow-hunted from a tree stand!).  Imagine my surprise (WHY when God "shows up" are we surprised?) when I pulled in to the cemetery and the sexton was there with a measuring tape, standing …

l.a.u.g.h.t.e.r.♥

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I am your Lord!  Seek Me as Friend and Lover of your soul, but remember that I am also King of kings - sovereign over all!  ~ Jesus Calling
This is a good reminder today and in the coming days.  As my human mind wants to SCREAM . . . Rick SHOULD BE HERE!  He should be sharing the pride that I am feeling and experiencing through Tessa's accomplishments as a SENIOR in High School.  He should be HERE with US . . . IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!  Yes, I do "shout" those words at God at times . . . because my human mind can't always grasp the sovereignty of God.  I'm thankful that at times like that, I'm led RIGHT BACK to HIM.  And promises like the one above.
HE IS SOVEREIGN OVER ALL!
Today does not find us alone and missing Rick unbeknownst to HIM!  He is my (our) Lord.  HE is the Friend and Lover of my (our) soul (s).  And HE is KING of kings, and SOVEREIGN over all!
So, when I don't understand, He doesn't expect me to understand.  He doesn't command me to under…

So true!

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Rejoice, be patient, be constant...

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Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Romans 12:12
Isn't this just the CUTEST thing you ever saw?  My girls saw it on Pinterest and made it for me for Mother's Day (with a few "tweaks" to make it their own!)  I LOVE IT . . .  and I LOVE THEM!
REJOICE in Hope - yes, we do, the HOPE we have of a glorious, Heavenly, ETERNAL reunion!
Be PATIENT in tribulation - I'm not always good at patience, but, I'm learning - He is teaching me, step-by-step!
Be CONSTANT in prayer - yes, I am, and others are for me (for us) and we can feel it - especially on days like today - days that could be melancholy and sad, but end up silly and happy and fun and filled with new memories!
I woke up this morning to BRIGHT SUNSHINE ☼ streaming in my bedroom window (we forgot to close the curtains!) and a clear blue sky . . . we OVERSLEPT was my first thought, as I rolled over to check the clock . . . 6:20 a.m., on a SUNDAY.  The ONLY day I COULD sleep in this week . …

a party and some conversations...

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I mentioned a couple of days ago (the last time I posted) about a family that recently went through a horrible loss.  The family who we are friends with are a Christian family who are very dear to me!  One of them had the following on his Facebook: 

"The body buried in the ground is meaningless...it's of this world.  It does rest, maybe in peace.  But what that body symbolized, the soul of a person, if he or she is in heaven, there is no rest, and it is a worship concert forever up there.  So, instead of rest in peace, why not say Party On those who were of this world and are in a place SOOO much better.  Singing and praising the LORD of LORD and KING of KINGS.  Praise be to God now and forever from those of this world, and those with Him. Amen."

Pretty insightful from a 16 year old boy!  What peace it reflects.  Even in experiencing terrible loss through family friends, he NAILED IT . . . those in Heaven are participating in the BEST worship concert ever . . . and it will…

I Will Rise sung by Chris Tomlin

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life is fragile . . .

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Tonight, I have a heavy heart.
Today, I heard of another loss.
An unexpected, earth-shattering, life altering loss.
All losses, I suppose fit that description, but one that comes so totally unexpectedly, seemingly "out of the blue" (to human minds) somehow seem to be a "wake up" call . . . a call to remind us that life is FRAGILE.  That not one of us knows the time or the place when the Lord will take us Home.
This loss came to a family that I do not know well, but they are friends to some of our VERY GOOD friends.  So, the family is hurting and our friends are hurting, and ultimately, I am hurting.
Maybe because I have experienced that unexpected, earth-shattering, life altering, "out of the blue" loss, I in some small way feel their pain, relate to their pain, their shock.  To honor their privacy, I won't give further details, it is their story to tell, not mine.
But, because of their story, I will say tonight, remember to LOVE those closest to you.  Hug …

too BLESSED not to BLOG!

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I was completely ready to go to bed and not blog tonight . . . but then I got thinking and realized that I was feeling "too BLESSED not to BLOG!" . . . 

I'm not going to be "deep" tonight . . . I'm just going to share some of the BLESSINGS that God bestowed on me today . . . 
I had a job (that I MOSTLY love) to go to today.I have great co-workers and I LOVE the kids at school!The weather warmed up some and it was a pretty nice day - even some sunshine peeked through!I went for a RUN . . . (3.16 miles) then I stopped and tanned and napped (yes, I was SO TIRED I fell asleep in the tanning bed!), I shopped (yes, there is shopping at my tanning place - and I have a CUTE pair of SHOES picked out - so glad I didn't buy any when I shopped this weekend - I must have tried on 50 pairs yesterday!)
I RAN home - and took the llooonnnnggggg way home . . . which resulted in 4.65 miles (and took me past the cemetery - of course I ran through and told Rick about it!) . . …

"Through It All" By Andrae Crouch

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Friends :)

Tonight I'm getting to bed fairly early, it's been a BUSY weekend!! God was (again) so good and it was an enjoyable weekend even though we marked yet another month gone by since Rick went "home"! On the other hand, we are now 6 months closer to our eternal reunion!! :)

Tonight, I just need to "voice" my thankfulness for the blessing God gave to me and Rick in our best friends Jim and Donna! I'm not even going to start in on ALL of my reasons for feeling this way or I'll NEVER get to bed! I'll just share that I will never forget Jim's presence next to me as I spoke with the transplant co-ordinator that day in the hospital - he was just "there" beside me through it all, even though he had just lost his "brother". And Donna has been the sister I never had-I'm SO BLESSED to have them! Some day, I'll share more! For tonight, I'll just say, "Thank you, Lord, for the blessing of Jim & Donna" and…

...of anniversaries & expectations...

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SATURDAY NOVEMBER 5, 2011 
. . . 
SATURDAY MAY 5, 2012
. . . 
Today was an "anniversary" I NEVER thought I'd have to experience.  Not at this stage in my life.  I never thought with one graduating from College (Nick) and one graduating from High School (Tessa) and the youngest grandbaby turning ONE in a few weeks (Lila) that I'd also be commemorating six months without their Daddy/Papa and my BEST FRIEND.  This isn't how the story was supposed to go (in my mind!) :(
Yet my "story" isn't really "my" story, it's His story and He has written it differently than I would have if I'd had the choice.
Saturday . . . I've blogged about this day before.  Yes, it DOES get a little easier when Saturday rolls around . . . a little better each week.  
The 5th of the month . . . I've blogged about this day before.  Yes, it DOES get a little easier when the 5th rolls around . . . a little better each month.
But, this time around, it was a SATURDAY…