... holding on ... and letting go ... ♥


...as your circumstances consume more and more of your attention,  you are losing sight of Me . . . yet I am with you always, HOLDING you by your right hand . . . I am fully aware of your situation!   ~ Jesus Calling

Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand.  Psalm 73:23

THAT is what I HAVE to hold on to . . . on the days like yesterday, on "those" days . . . I need to remember to HOLD on . . . He does know what He is doing . . . and He is ALWAYS holding me . . . He has promised that over and over!  Speaking of yesterday, today was a much better day.  I remembered to "grab" hold of HIS hand a little tighter again today . . . and He opened my eyes again to all of the blessings I DO have but sometimes fail to see and appreciate fully!  He is so amazing!  And, as I learn over and over and over again to "Hold On", I also am learning day by day to "Let Go" . . . I got a "crash course" in letting go on November 5, yet I have much learning left to do . . . 


 . . . for, me "letting go" of Rick was "easy" in the sense that I knew EXACTLY where he was.  I knew that he was in the very presence of his Lord and Savior, so to "let him go" was the response that comforted me!  Heaven's glories can't even begin to compare to this earth so as difficult as that "letting go" was there was comfort and assurance in it.  The pain I felt (feel) was for me and the rest of us "left behind", it wasn't for Rick!  There was the knowledge that even if he could, he wouldn't want to come back, the knowledge that he was safe and whole, the knowledge that we WILL be reunited some day.  There were so many things that I knew for sure, that I could rest in them.  

Now, "letting go" of my kids is another story.  I don't doubt that they are any more in God's hands than Rick was, yet, to "let them go" is to let them go to much more of an unknown (I KNOW ultimately it will be Heaven, but it's the "immediate" unknown that I mean here!)!  And, I have been accused in the past of "keeping my children in a bubble" . . . so, today, after school when Tessa and her friend Katie came to my desk and asked, "can we go to Iron Mountain", I'm sure that Tessa assumed she knew the answer would be a "no", however, reminding myself that GOD is in control of my children's safety, not me, I said yes.  Realizing that when I was her age, I'd already graduated from high school and had gone ALONE to California and Colorado - with NO cell phone!  My instinct is to pull them closer, to hold them tighter to never let them out of my sight . . . to not risk any injury to them, or to my fragile heart.  But, I must step back, I must remember that as hard as it is to comprehend, God loves them . . . so much more than I or their Daddy ever could!  

So in one SMALL way, with one little word, I "let go" a little more today.  I'm working on letting them spread their wings and soar on the wind.  To find what GOD wants of them for their lives!  


Today, the day after one of "those" days, God "showed up" (because I LET Him) and He helped me with two life lessons . . . 
holding on AND letting go . . . all in the same day!

He's good like that! ♥

Comments

  1. So happy for your thoughts today! I'm not able to know how you feel as I have not walked in your shoes. But my Mom was left with us 3 kids like you are now; grades 7th 9th and 10th, my Dad was 56. It took me years later to realize what it must have been like for my mother. Her days and years were far more difficult than ours were as kids, but WE MADE IT with the Lord's help. The Lord's promises then were the same as they are TODAY and WILL BE TOMORROW! Knowing you are trusting HIM for every 'moment' gives us peace. We PRAY for you every day!!!
    We miss Rick too, and are so happy for his influence and LEGACY he leaves to you and the girls and Nick & Ashley!(& how his life 'touched' sooo many others is why he's missed so MUCH!) We LOVE YOU!

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